Tips for Dealing with Regret and Remorse
There must be at least one thing you regret that you did or didn't do, have said or kept silent. If you have made a serious mistake or were negligent, you might feel disgusted and remorseful and the memory may even haunt you.
It is normal to feel sorry or repentant especially if you can't get the thought off your mind. But whatever has happened took place in the past. No matter what you do in the present, you can't change it. Allowing the memory to remain etched in your mind brings a lot of pain.
If you don't deal with regret, you will keep on feeling guilty, sad and angry. Being able to push it very far away from your mind will help you move on with life and live in the present.
Dealing with Regret No. 1 - Take Responsibility
If you are serious about dealing with regret and overcoming your pang of guilt, anger and shame, admit that you were at fault and no one else should take the blame. Someone may have been involved but it was you who made the final decision and took action.
Dealing with Regret No. 2 - Forgive Yourself
Forgive yourself for your foolishness. If you were mature enough, you would have acted more responsibly. Now that you are aware of your past mistake, promise yourself that you won't repeat it. When you stop making the same error, it shows that you are serious and really want to make a change.
Affirm statements such as "I admit that I have made a mistake. But that was then. I choose to forgive myself and everyone who have contributed to it. From now on, I choose to make better decisions." Positive affirmations help replace negative self talk.
Dealing with Regret No. 3 - Change Your Thoughts
Your feelings are likely exaggerated by the pictures that you have created in your mind. When you keep entertaining your thoughts on the missed opportunity or mistake, you are giving the thoughts more power. And because of this, the feeling of regret will deepen and you will continue to dislike yourself. Push yourself to change your mindset and interpret it differently. Look at it as an invaluable lesson.
You have control over your thoughts. The only reason that it's not working for you is because you are not using it to your advantage. You can change your old mental programming and conditioning by challenging your limited thinking and beliefs and replacing them with new mental pictures, positive affirmations and developing a new self image.
Dealing with Regret No. 4 - Change Your Focus of Attention
Instead of looking back, look at the present and also look ahead. Start to build new dreams and develop a set of new goals. Having big goals and a very strong desire to accomplish them will change your focus of attention.
The exercise of setting smart goals will make you look at your strengths and weakness. It gives you hope that there is a future ahead. It pushes you to think and to devise a workable plan or strategy. When you have something worthwhile to look forward to, you will spend less time on reminiscing the past.
Dealing with Regret No. 5 - Do Good
Another tip for dealing with regret is to do many good things to yourself and to others. Do it because you want to feel good not because you want to atone for your misdeeds. Not once but as often as you can. You will make more friends and develop better interpersonal relationships. The good deeds that you do will make you feel worthy.
Dealing with Regret No. 6 - Use Emotional Freedom Technique
Emotional freedom technique or EFT is a helpful tool in releasing emotional attachment and dealing with regret. The technique makes use of your fingers to tap on certain parts of your body to release blocked energy within you. Click the link to find out more about EFT tapping and how it can help you let go or negative emotions.
Related Articles
Overcoming Guilt
Dealing with Your Past
How to Stop Negative Thoughts
Emotional Health
Dealing with Regret to Personal Growth Home
Source: http://www.about-personal-growth.com/dealing-with-regret.html
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